I scream, as we row without any paddles.

I spoke about accountability partners in a different post, but there is something comforting about having friends or peers who are just as clueless as you are and are going through similar things you’re going through.

It might seem like the blind leading the blind, but there is something powerful in this collaboration. I say, rely on this friend who’s in the same boat as you, because no one else can understand your situation better than them. They know your struggles because they’re also going through the same thing. There is a joy in discovering the pitfalls and taking risks together because you have each other’s backs. We do this all the time, and I think its time to do it with finances as well.

Talk to each other and help keep each other afloat. Help them stay on track with their money habits and improving those habits while they help you do the same. You always run the risk of getting comfortable and doing nothing. But at least you are trying something.

My friend was planning a wedding a while back, and we both were quite unhealthy to say the least. We also had no idea how to get better. But. We decided that we would try and get better at it together. We planned to do yoga everyday and change the little things in our diet together. Granted, we spent most of the time binging Netflix and eating ice-cream, and essentially putting on more weight, but we had a great time doing it together. Yeah okay, this isnt the success story you were hoping to hear, but I will never forget the time we tried to do something together. Years later, we formed a walking group (yes its an aunty type thing …I’m in my 30’s now back off! haha) and got into the habit of going for a walk every day without fail for about six months.

That lead to me being more focused on health and prioritizing it for the first time in a long time. I started thinking about what I like about fitness. I loath fitness by the way, but this prompted me to think about it in a more positive way. And I took up swimming. Now I swim every day. Not as a compulsion, but because I like doing it.

I still occasionally go on walks, but my main thing is to swim. You might discover something similar in your financial journey while you partner up with your friend in need 🙂

It might take some time, but it will be a non-judgemental and comforting experience out of which something long-lasting might come out.

Try these on for size –

• If you both have a debilitating spending problem, watch out for each other.
• Share your plans with each other and ask them – how are you planning to fund that? (in a nice way). Say your friend is wants to go on a vacation, give them suggestions for places nearby that are budget friendly. Help them brainstorm ideas for frugal vacations. And, if you have the bandwidth, go with them!
• Do not hide your spending from one another. The whole point of this partnership is lost if you do. This is YOUR safe space. You may take some time to open up about it, but do it anyway.
• Slowly start reminding each other on the FIRST of every month, to save an agreed upon sum in a separate bank account. Do this while on the phone with one another if possible?
• Be open with each other and share your income with each other.
• Share your knowledge base. If both of you know little to begin with, start doing some research together. Invite people who have invested and know a little about this into the conversation.
• Learn to say NO to your friend. They ask your opinion about buying a new thing, and you know their situation. Tell them NO. They shouldn’t be doing it. Obviously I don’t mean for you to do this all the time, but there are times where you will have to say no, and try to enforce it. You will recognize when this happens. Take action 🙂
• Try new things together!
  • If you’ve never invested in mutual funds for example, make a day out of it together. Go to their place, fire up the laptop, sit together and invest a say 500 in an index mutual fund for the day. After the day you’ve had, go out for chaat and chill.
  • Create a goal-based fund! If you or your friend have a short-term goal in mind, like buying a car, or buying a phone, plan for it together and create a goal-based fund through your bank account (a recurring deposit or a fixed deposit)
  • Buy a stock. Figure out a stock that you want to buy and invest in it! (Not a lot, this is just for experimentation and figuring out what kind of investor you are)
• Keep the cadence nice and breezy. Go with the flow. There might be days where you don’t really feel like doing the thing. Your friend might remind you to save on the 1st of the month, but you may not have done it yet. Tell your friend that you didn’t and ask for their help.